What are the signs of autism in girls?
Autism is more prevalent in boys than girls, and it is often questioned whether this is a true figure or whether the signs of autism are overlooked more often in girls.
At Veritas assessments we see many girls and women whose autistic differences have been missed.
We work with children and adults of all ages, but commonly see females presenting in their early 20’s. They will usually be finding life difficult and will have been diagnosed with anxiety and / or depression. These clients describe a similar pattern of difficulty which includes heightened difficulties at the ages of 11 -14 (coinciding with the transition to high school).
The core characteristics of autism are the same in males and females, and include:
- Difficulties with social interaction
- Lack of interest in, or difficulties with relationships
- Communication differences
along with a pattern of repetitive and restricted behaviours and interests such as:
- Highly focussed interests
- Repetitive behaviours
- Sensory differences
Whilst the characteristics are the same for boys and girls, they may not be so obvious in females.
Girls and woman tend to ‘camouflage’ or ‘mask’ their difficulties, meaning that they will copy other’s behaviours to ‘blend in’ and to try and be seen as similar to their peers. Doing this is exhausting, and autistic girls will often limit their social interaction in order to cope with this. They may manage one or two friendships but may not be able to interact with groups or may choose to limit their social relationships to times when they have no choice to interact (for example having social relationships that only exist in school).
Difficulties with social interaction and relationships
Early Years
Parents of autistic girls often describe the early years as unremarkable. Their daughters appeared to develop typically and developed speech at the expected time.
Some describe their daughters being very shy as a young child whilst others describe a bossy child.
The ‘shyness’ is often caused by the child not knowing how to interact with others or being worried about not knowing what is expected of them; the ‘bossiness’ has the same cause, with the child trying to control situations so that they are predictable and manageable.
Autistic girls do often engage in some imaginative play which can also lead to autism being missed. Imaginative solitary is often restricted or repetitive, but not obviously so.
When Connie plays, the blue teddy is always the teacher and the teddies are always sat in the same positions. The scenes that Connie plays out with her teddies are based on things that have happened that day in school, Connie observes others throughout the day and picks up on a lot of interactions between others, so she has lots of examples to use in her play. She chooses her own outcomes though, so it is not obvious that she is re-enacting the school day.
If we observe Connie we can hear her talking to her teddies, she talks as if she is the teacher and as if she is the pupil; but she does not use the teddies as agents of action. This means that when the teacher is telling the pupils off, Connie is not only saying the words but she is pointing her finger at the pupils, she does not move the teacher teddy as if the teddy is telling the pupils off.
When she is finished with her game, she places the teddies back on her bed in the same order each time. She does not play other games with them.
When playing imaginative games with other children, autistic girls will either take a passive role or take charge of the play.
Taking a passive role means that the other children will tell them what to do, so they can play along without needing to use novel responses as they go. They may choose a more passive role in the play, for example if playing ‘house’ or ‘family’ they may choose to take on the role of the pet so that they avoid social interaction.
Taking charge of the play means that they can limit the play to situations and interactions they are familiar with; they may try telling the other children what to do or what to say so that they can use well-rehearsed responses within the play.
We often hear that whilst girls do play imaginatively, they will often choose activities that do not require social imagination although can be creative. Autistic girls often love Lego, arts and crafts or cooking. They may prefer to make clothes for their dolls or to style their hair rather than use them in pretend play.
Primary School
Sometimes autistic girls have difficulty with starting school, they may be ‘clingy’ and not want to separate or have somatic symptoms such as tummy pain when it is time to go to school. Other girls enjoy primary school and can’t wait to go in every day.
Due to the nature of primary schools, children spend their school years with the same pupils and it is therefore easier for them to develop friendships. As has been mentioned previously, they may take a passive role in play and friendships or may try and take control of these.
The child who tries to take control may experience frequent arguments within friendships due to the other children not wanting to follow their directions all the time.
Autism is often seen alongside dyslexia, so there may be some issues with reading and writing; other autistic girls have no particular issues with school work.
During the primary years, parents and teachers are often unaware of how the child’s social difficulties are impacting them and therefore do not have any concerns. However, our clients often tell us that they felt on the outside of things in primary school and felt different to others there.
Secondary School
The transition to secondary school is anxiety provoking for all children, and during the initial transfer autistic girls often do not appear to have anymore difficulties than their peers. During the first weeks the children will be supported by staff to navigate the school, lessons and expectations; groups of friends from primary school will stay together, find classrooms and share lunch together.
As the weeks go on, the children become settled and the noise level starts to increase; this can cause difficulties for autistic children. School buses, dinner halls and hallways can be a particular issue.
After a few months, the new year 7’s become comfortable with the new way of learning and shift their focus from school rules and lessons to social interaction. Their friendship groups from primary school start to disintegrate and new friendship groups are formed.
It is at this point that autistic girls start to find things hugely difficult, especially if they do not have a diagnosis and are not supported.
At this point and over the next couple of years, the undiagnosed autistic girl will tend to really struggle with social interaction, making friendships and feeling as if they are ‘on the outside’ of friendship groups. They may begin actively ‘camouflaging’ or become socially avoidant or both.
When ‘camouflaging’, girls will study their peers intently and attempt to copy their behaviours and even pretend to like the things that they like in order to fit in. They may want to dress like them, style their hair like them or do the things that they do. When copying others, girls manage their social interactions through a set of ‘rules’ that they have created based on their observations. This is cognitively exhausting and parents may notice that they need to spend time alone when they return from school in order to recover from this.
Girls who ‘mask’ or ‘camouflage’ will copy lots of different peers as they progress through school, this in turn can lead to difficulties with understanding who they really are and what makes them tick when they get older. Many girls are left with lifelong difficulties with self-esteem and self-acceptance because the fact that they were autistic was not recognised.
For some girls the anxiety around school can become so overwhelming they start to try and avoid the situations that cause them distress all together. This can range from them not wanting to travel to school on the bus, choosing to go to the library or another quiet area during lunch or break times or refusing to go to school. Sometimes, they will have a friend who makes things more manageable for them and will only go to school when they are in school, or in lessons with them on that day.
Whether socially avoidant or camouflaging and not getting it quite right, undiagnosed autistic girls can be a particular target for bullies. Trauma from bullying can have a significant impact in later life.
As undiagnosed autistic girls get a little older, their difficulties and negative experiences can impact their self esteem and self confidence. As they are not aware of their autistic differences, they can experience depression and anxiety, and these diagnoses are often used as an explanation for their difficulties – meaning that autism is overlooked again.
Communication
Differences in communication can be hidden due to the child masking their difficulties throughout their life. There is often a difference in the way the child communicates at home due to them being more relaxed and comfortable. Some of the characteristics of communications differences in autistic girls are:
Unusual eye contact
This could be avoiding eye contact, giving too much eye contact or not using subtle changes in eye contact to communicate with others.
Facial Expression
Differences might be having a mostly neutral or ‘blank’ facial expression, looking sad or happy most of the time (even when the situation or topic changes) or not coordinating facial expressions with speech and eye contact.
Gesture
Difference might be not using gesture when talking, not being able to describe something (such as size or motion) with their hands or using over-exaggerated gesture that distracts others.
Restricted and / or Repetitive Interests
Restricted and repetitive interests may not be obvious in autistic girls. The girl may have restricted or repetitive play as described above. They may enjoy a hobby such as drawing or writing intently, whilst on the surface this does not appear unusual, they spend a lot of time enjoying this and may not spontaneously share their work with others.
Autistic girls will often like to collect things; colourful erasers, semi-precious stones / gems and make-up are common collections.
They may like to watch the same TV programme or spend lots of time watching YouTube videos about a specific subject, this could range from factual documentaries about specific animals to make-up tutorials.
The child may have interests that do not appear in keeping with their age range, for example wanting to learn details about outer space at a young age or collecting cuddly toys when a teenager.
Restricted and Repetitive Behaviours
Again, these might not appear obviously unusual. The child may like to do things in certain ways, such as following a specific routine to get ready, or when they return from school.
Repetitive behaviours might be subtle such as repetitively stroking or pinching their thigh, twisting their fingers or fiddling with their hair or earrings in a repetitive way.
Sensory Differences
Sensory differences can vary over time, the sensory differences could mean they seek sensory input or they avoid sensory input or a mixture of both. Sensory seeking behaviours could include behaviours such as stroking a doll’s hair, stroking or wrapping themselves in a fluffy blanket, bouncing or watching patterns of light. Sensory avoidant behaviours might include placing their hands over their ears in response to loud noises, fussiness with food, refusing to use escalators or needing labels to be removed from clothes.
Adulthood
After school undiagnosed girls continue to struggle. They may find a job or go to university but continue to struggle with the social side of this. They may experience levels of social anxiety that stop them from following their dreams and goals.
At this point of independence the young women often start to look into their difficulties and notice a pattern of differences that could be explained by autism and refer themselves for an assessment. Our clients are often faced with long waiting lists, or difficulty getting referred for an assessment so opt for a private assessment instead.
Categorised in: Symptoms of Autism